in the pit of despair ..sometimes the dark side is my salvation


holding on to my bleeding heart
a scarred reminder
of 70 stitches, 4 rods 24 screw,and a halo
(remember we made it into wind chimes)
was i foolish…it seems i was not
four years later
nobody will ever fit so perfectly.
overwhelmed by their fleeting attempts
wanting to want them
you will always be it
although you feel the same
watching me die was too much..
anger mates with fear
and i am their child of lonliness.

i watch this video over and over and revel in that
SNAP
the sound of your leg snapping.
a sly smile
then tears because i wish to rush to you
hold your hand …like i did when it happened.
moments forever lost.
if i hadnt run so far you may have come back..
now, we are lost in this vast sea drifting away eternally.

2 responses to “in the pit of despair ..sometimes the dark side is my salvation

    • its a really personal writing…so ill only say a bit
      a heel hook is a jiu jitsu move known to shatter bones.
      i once helped someone rehab from this..
      the rest…same old story lost love
      or love lost due to anothers fear.
      that was hard to answer ..but thanks for asking.

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